Ubiquitous
2009-02-13 23:44:15 UTC
When Vince ShamWow's name comes up, Billy Mays rolls up his sleeves,
sandpapers the inside of his throat and goes off. During an interview
with Adam Corolla, a caller asked about Vince and Billy went on and on
about how he was going to take that little bitch down. Billy said that
when it comes to the ShamWow, Billy laid down the foundation, Vince
built the house and now he's going to redecorate. Yeah, I don't know how
Billy became Debbie Travis. It's like I suddenly switched over to HGTV.
Billy said he was ready to have a pitch-off with Vince any time, any
place. That kind of sounds dirty sexy. Why do I picture Billy's hairy
low-hangers on Vince's meth-face?
Personally, I think that if they got into a room together, the world
would implode. This shit probably has something to do with those two
satellites crashing into each other. They heard this news first and
couldn't fucking take it. So if Billy and Vince actually faced off,
Earth would collide with another planet and turn into star dust.
But seriously, even though Billy looks like he could kill a grizzly bear
with his pinky toe, methinks he's still no match for Vince. Vince might
look like a tweaked out turtle, but the bitch was crazy enough to start
a one-man war against Scientology. Nothing scares him.
Billy's rant is below:
sandpapers the inside of his throat and goes off. During an interview
with Adam Corolla, a caller asked about Vince and Billy went on and on
about how he was going to take that little bitch down. Billy said that
when it comes to the ShamWow, Billy laid down the foundation, Vince
built the house and now he's going to redecorate. Yeah, I don't know how
Billy became Debbie Travis. It's like I suddenly switched over to HGTV.
Billy said he was ready to have a pitch-off with Vince any time, any
place. That kind of sounds dirty sexy. Why do I picture Billy's hairy
low-hangers on Vince's meth-face?
Personally, I think that if they got into a room together, the world
would implode. This shit probably has something to do with those two
satellites crashing into each other. They heard this news first and
couldn't fucking take it. So if Billy and Vince actually faced off,
Earth would collide with another planet and turn into star dust.
But seriously, even though Billy looks like he could kill a grizzly bear
with his pinky toe, methinks he's still no match for Vince. Vince might
look like a tweaked out turtle, but the bitch was crazy enough to start
a one-man war against Scientology. Nothing scares him.
Billy's rant is below:
--
It is simply breathtaking to watch the glee and abandon with which
the liberal media and the Angry Left have been attempting to turn
our military victory in Iraq into a second Vietnam quagmire. Too bad
for them, it's failing.
It is simply breathtaking to watch the glee and abandon with which
the liberal media and the Angry Left have been attempting to turn
our military victory in Iraq into a second Vietnam quagmire. Too bad
for them, it's failing.